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<p class=MsoNormal><span class=SpellE><b><span style='font-family:Arial'>Farmin</span></b></span><b><span
style='font-family:Arial'>' ABC's: Aphids, Borscht, and Caterpillars</span></b></p>
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<p class=MsoNormal><span style='color:red'>Aphid Borscht?</span> <br>
<a href="index.html">Home</a></p>
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<p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>"Oregano
Doesn't Have Legs, Dad"</span></b><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>That's what my 10-year
old daughter said. She's right, you know, and she should know. At
harvest time, I bring in bushels of wholesome if uninspiring vegetables from
our 15 by 30-foot garden. You might think that "bushels" is a
figure of speech, but just ask my indentured laborers: my son and
daughter. They will confirm every word, especially that
"bushel" part. </span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Well,
"uninspiring" is perhaps a tad misleading, for mounds of produce
piled on our kitchen counters, table, floors and hallways has in fact inspired
me to many a great culinary adventure. For instance, take my beets.
Please. (Sorry, Mr. Youngman.) We have a clay-laden soil that beets
evidently love, and they showed us their affection annually. Only
problem is, nobody in the family really likes beets. I've planted them
because they grow so well. Not the best reason, perhaps, but what can I
say? I'm a cheapskate, and free food by the hundredweight really
appeals to me.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>And, in the case of beets
with the family, to no one <b><i>but </i></b>me.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>There are not a lot of
ways to prepare beets: boiled, served with vinegar (I'm a former Vermonter,
eh-yah.); cold, in beet salad like my Dad made; and in borscht. I'm sure
my children rue the day I learned to make borscht from a pastor in <st1:place
w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Chester</st1:City>, <st1:State w:st="on">Vermont</st1:State></st1:place>.
He'd invited me for lunch, and put a bowl of (I
-didn't-quite-know-what-but-Mom-always-taught-me-to
eat-whatever-I-was-served-especially-when-I-was-a-guest) soup in front of
me. I tried some of the hot purple stew, declining the sour cream
proffered by my host. As I had no expectations, I was doubly delighted
with the taste, and polished off several <span class=SpellE>bowlsful</span>. There
was no need to feign appetite; it was really good.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>That was the start of my
avocation as The Baron of Borscht.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>To make borscht, you also
need cabbage. That's easy enough to come up with, as it's always cheap to buy
in autumn. Alternatively, you can scavenge along a rural roadside for
cabbages that have fallen off farm trucks. (Don't knock it until you've tried
it. You are going to cook it anyway, so calm down.)</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>You also need onions,
some spices such as basil (fresh if possible), oregano, a bay leaf, pepper,
and salt. I add a little olive oil for flavor, instead of throwing in
some meat like my pastor friend did. His wife added a secret ingredient:
about a cup of tomato paste. This, she maintained, improved not only the
taste but also the color of the borscht, reducing the soup's otherwise
intimidating purple to a rather inviting magenta.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <br>
</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'> </span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <br>
</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>If you are unusually
inexperienced in the kitchen, I will add that you also need water.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Boil all this up, and
there you are: cheap, healthy, ethnic and plentiful. I like borscht, and
I've had some of the best, and made by genuine Russians, too. At Holy Trinity
Monastery, the beautiful Orthodox church and farm in <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City
w:st="on"><span class=SpellE>Jordanville</span></st1:City>, <st1:State
w:st="on">New York</st1:State></st1:place>, try to stick around long enough
for the monks to ask you for dinner. They may make the best borscht in <st1:place
w:st="on">North America</st1:place>. I have Polish acquaintances that
would dispute this, however, one going so far as to attempt to instruct me in
distinguishing between different types of borscht. This apparently can become
almost an exercise in taxonomy: there is white borscht, red borscht, <span
class=GramE>something</span> pronounced "<span class=SpellE>baar-scht</span>"
as opposed to "boor-<span class=SpellE>scht</span>," and on and on.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>But nobody but me makes
aphid borscht, and back to my confession.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'>
<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>My particular variation
on the borscht theme is to add broccoli, another vegetable my soil (if you
can call it that) will yield in quantity. There are zillions of ways to
cook broccoli, of course (and don't forget raw, with dips or in
salads). Still, when you fill an entire freezer with broccoli and there
is still more a-<span class=SpellE>comin</span>', you have to use this green
stuff up somehow. I, of course, toss it in the soup, which includes my
minestrone, pea soup, and lentil soup as well as borscht. </span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Now being a natural kind
of guy, I do not use pesticides. No need for any chemical bug-killers
with broccoli or beets, or, for that matter, anything else that I grow:
lettuce, green beans, squash, tomatoes, potatoes or even raspberries. Nope,
just good-old-fashioned cow manure, or grass clippings, or compost, or some
cheap fertilizer from Wal-Mart. Or all of the above. You too can be
drowning in fresh food.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Here's a trick to double
your broccoli harvest: after you pick the first few batches of florets, let
the broccoli plant stay rooted and growing in your garden. It will
probably bloom again, and maybe even again after that. Broccoli is tough and
fairly frost-resistant. I live just south of the Canadian border,
remember, and even I can get multiple broccoli harvests up to Thanksgiving.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>If you do not spray your
broccoli, you do get some wildlife living in it. Broccoli caterpillars,
always quite small, happen to be exactly the color of broccoli itself. They
are thus quite invisible to the salad eater. Fortunately. Or not, depending
on your point of view. My daughter wishes to share with the world a Great
Truth that she believes she has personally uncovered for all time: broccoli
caterpillars turn yellow when cooked. So the simple way to get rid of
them is to lightly steam your broccoli, and the now-yellow critters will be
easy to spot.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>At this juncture, you
must think that I wantonly fed my family half of the world's insect
species. That is only partly true.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'>
<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>We did eat the aphids.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Not intentionally, mind
you. It's just that aphids are extremely tiny, and they literally stick
together and to broccoli stems, up under the florets where they know you are
not looking. Even cooking fails to dislodge them, for their little
boiled corpses are to be found in their hundreds still clinging to broccoli
spears.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Some will fall off, and
float in, say, your borscht. And this brings us to the day when my
daughter bravely insisted to me that there were bugs in her soup.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>"No," I
asserted with all my science-teacher authority, "Those are not
bugs. That's oregano."</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>My daughter was utterly
unconvinced, and upon looking very, very closely, uttered the line,
"Oregano doesn't have legs, Dad."</span><span style='font-size:
11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>So she was right.
Big deal!? Well, yes. I realized that in my organic zeal, I had failed
to be fair to my family. Perhaps it is not right to feed your kids
bugs. (This story got out, by the way, and echoes of it can still be
heard throughout the school district.)</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>I came up with a chemical-free
solution, though: a week or so before broccoli harvest, I will drop one of my
many unemployed, idle and hungry spiders onto each broccoli plant. Returning
as soon as the next day, there are no more aphids to be seen. Yes, I
like spiders. Insect bites annoy me more than most people, and insect damage
to crops pleases no one. So when anybody finds a spider roaming idly
around the house, they stick an upturned glass over it to save it for
me. What they do not know is that I put these spiders in the garage and
the basement, where they quietly prosper, waiting to be called up to the big
leagues outdoors. My supply is thus assured.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>I'd like to add that
spiders are basically quite harmless little guys. Even tarantulas are
incapable of doing any serious harm to a person, James Bond movies
notwithstanding. If you are very sensitive to bug bites, have a known medical
condition, or handle Black Widows, the rules are of course different.
But even I do not actually handle the spiders. You can move them about
to your heart's content with a cup, a scrap of <span class=GramE>cardboard,</span>
or gloved hands.</span><span style='font-size:11.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Spiders in your garden do
your bug-killing with Green Beret precision. Early morning outback in my
yard, you can see the dew drops on several dozen spider webs. I think of them
as my employees. They eat insects, and they work cheap. Put them to
work, and sit back. Your broccoli, like mine, will no longer shelter the
bugs that your little princess won't, for some reason, eat.</span><span
style='font-size:11.0pt'> <br>
</span> </p>
<p><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial'>Copyright 2001 and prior
years by Andrew W. Saul.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p><b style='mso-bidi-font-weight:normal'><span style='font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Arial'>Andrew Saul is the <span class=GramE><span class=grame>author
of the books <i>FIRE</i></span></span><i> YOUR DOCTOR!</i> How <i>to be
Independently Healthy </i>(reader reviews at<i> </i><a
href="http://www.doctoryourself.com/review.html">http://www.doctoryourself.com/review.html</a>
) and <i>DOCTOR YOURSELF: Natural Healing that Works.</i> (reviewed at <a
href="http://www.doctoryourself.com/saulbooks.html">http://www.doctoryourself.com/saulbooks.html</a>
) </span><o:p></o:p></b></p>
<p><b style='mso-bidi-font-weight:normal'><span style='font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Arial'>For ordering information, <a
href="http://www.doctoryourself.com/order.html">Click Here</a></span> .<o:p></o:p></b></p>
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<a href="contact.html">Andrew W. Saul</a></p>
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<p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:7.5pt'>AN IMPORTANT NOTE:
This page is not in any way offered as prescription, diagnosis nor treatment
for any disease, illness, infirmity or physical condition. Any form of
self-treatment or alternative health program necessarily must involve an
individual's acceptance of some risk, and no one should assume
otherwise. Persons needing medical care should obtain it from a
physician. Consult your doctor before making any health decision. </span>
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<p><span style='font-size:7.5pt'>Neither the author nor the webmaster has
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style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial'>| <a
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